blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

blxckbiird:

spaghetti-western-wannabe:

So I can either bake these cookies at 400 degrees for 10 minutes or 4,000 degrees for 1 minute.

nick nO THAT’S NOT HOW YOU BAKE COOKIES FRIEND

FLOOR IT?

NICK NO

HOW ABOUT 4,000,000 DEGREES FOR 1 SECOND

NICK YOU ARE GOING TO BURN YOUR HOUSE DOWN

I’M GOING TO HARNESS THE FUCKING SUN TO MAKE COOKIES

NICK P L E A S E

(via siro-cyl)

the-robot-condese:

tiny-little-nebula:

taloa-nashoba:

thatthirstyniggafromclass:

misconceptions about strippers. 

pussy preach more sense than the fuckin government.

I want to break necks when people shade strippers. Let’s see your janky ass get out there and look that cute in 6 inch heels for 8 hours, smiling the entire time, stroking egos, pretending a dude’s breath doesn’t smell like a rotten animal.

Truth.

My sister has a Masters in Education. She got a job at one of the poorest schools in the city, but didn’t make enough money to pay to keep her tiny house heated through the Oregon winter or buy enough food or take her dog to the vet (first person who drops the word rehome gets a kick in the face.) so she quit and the only job she could get because she’s “overqualified” to work at Fred Meyers was at a strip club because she minored in ballet. I think people forget that stripping is like any other job: you have to have some experience.

And all those crumpled one dollar bills? 20% of that goes back into the club because strippers are renting the stages they dance on. Sometimes it’s more.

Despite all of that, my sister makes more money than she ever did because she works 80 hour weeks and literally never takes a day off. She teaches classes to drunk white girls, she does private parties, she does entertainment for conferences and shows. 

When I had to go to the ER last February and got a bill for $800 that I couldn’t pay, my sister sent me money so I wouldn’t be sent to collections. 

My sister is the classiest motherfucker in a pair of six inch heels. Anyone who calls her a dumb slut or a hoe gets their shit wrecked.

that’s the best thing i ever just heard get said

(via geekylittlecephalopod)

So one of my best friends had a medieval fantasy wedding

congalineofdurin:

at a hella cool castle

image

the groom channeled Thranduil and the Baratheons

image

the bridesmaids were elf maidens

image

the court jester and town crier were there

image

the cakes were gorgeous

image

image

luckily a friar was passing through town who was able to officiate (“mawwaige,” he said, “is what bwings us togevver today”)

image

the bride’s chariot was pulled by the most beautiful creature

image

unfortunately, as with all medieval weddings, there is the dragon problem

image

(via geekylittlecephalopod)

(via peteneems)

rider-waite:

joyceanfartboner:

unexplained-events:

Strange Marine Creature

This strange creature was filmed underwater by drillers in the deep ocean. It is called Deepstaria enigmatica. It looks like an underwater dementor.

VIDEO

i dont believe in it

i dont want to believe in it

(via unexplained-events)

sugarstitchplush:

Deadpool Zipper Pouch.

Commission, not for sale.

Deadpool belongs to Marvel.

Pouch is by me.

(via geekylittlecephalopod)

asker

Anonymous asked: Re: your "rule about naked people" -- How about people who take nude photos of themselves not be stupid and use storage devices that can be hacked, like cloud storage (or take any risks close to that)? Just HOW much personal responsibility does your generation need to shed before you get it through your thick skulls that it only costs $20 for a decent external hard drive these days? :|

fishingboatproceeds:

"The lock on your diary wasn’t very good, so it’s your fault I read your diary."